The epidemic of Christians consuming pornography is one of the defining failures of our time. While lust has always been a besetting sin, the convergence of smartphones, the internet, and the ethics of the sexual revolution have created a perfect storm. Over the years, I’ve reviewed a number of good books addressing pornography and the broader issue of sexual purity. Fight Like a Man by Emeal Zwayne joins a growing list of books seeking to address this problem from a biblical worldview. Zwayne specifically addresses sexual sin, but much of the book applies equally to any besetting sin.
The book divides roughly into two themes: understanding our enemies and strategies to live victoriously. Each of our three enemies--the world, the flesh, and the devil—attack us differently. We resist the devil by refusing to believe his lies over God’s truth. “A person demonstrating true faith responds with actions that reflect a sincere belief in what God has said. And they do this despite what they may think or feel” (44). We resist the flesh by practicing spiritual disciplines and putting on the Spirit-filled life. We resist the world by rejecting its wisdom and choosing to look to Christ for approval. In the latter part of the book, Zwayne lays out a strategy for victory with what he calls “6 C’s and a Nope”. The 6 C’s are practical truths to remember when we face temptation, including Creation (remember that God created everything, including our bodies and desires), Crisis (remember the consequences of sin), and Christ (remember that Jesus took our sin and sympathizes with our weaknesses). The final strategy, “Nope” is about learning to say no to temptation and reminding our heart of truth in moments of weakness.
I appreciate Zwayne’s reminder that “God is not a cosmic killjoy who is stingy with his children”, but rather, “He revels in giving us good gifts” (214). Our lustful cravings begin when “we deprive ourselves of feasting on Jesus as our ultimate source of spiritual satisfaction” (243). The author also emphasizes the importance of preparing ahead for the moment of temptation. Scripture meditation and memorization play a key practical role here.
Although Zwayne’s book is biblically grounded, several weaknesses deserve to be addressed. First, as the title makes clear, this book is focused toward men. And while a gender-specific book is fine, too many books on sexual sin wrongly frame this as a “man’s problem” without acknowledging that women can struggle too. Second, Zwayne promotes accountability groups as more biblical than ordinary friendships. He’s right that we need people to ask us tough questions, but perhaps a better emphasis is that true friendships provide accountability while also replacing sinful fantasies with real relationship. Third, along with the other 6 strategies, saying “nope” (preferably audibly) seems like a practical tool to resist lust. But it’s important to emphasize that saying “nope” as a Spirit-empowered act of faith is different than simply relying on white-knuckled effort.
In the end, Fight Like a Man is a good book, though not a perfect one. The author’s tendency toward worn-out metaphors, awkwardly abundant alliteration, and unwieldy subtitles sometimes feels tedious. Nevertheless, Zwayne presents a biblical and practical foundation for living in victory over sin that many may find helpful.